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General :
Broken Heart Syndrome

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 Laura28 (original poster member #28997) posted at 12:53 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026

Hi everyone. Next week will be 16 years since I found out my FWH had multiple LTAs. I really don’t know how many but I know it was a lot. Spanned probably 25 years or more. Anyway, I haven’t been here for ages but a recent newspaper article prompted me to post to about broken heart syndrome. This is real and something to be very careful of. I had what was initially thought to be a heart attack a few months after I found out. I had been in an incredibly high state of arousal - fear, anxiety etc - for some time, which apparently can lead to constant rushes of adrenalin which places a severe strain on one’s heart. Although it mimics a heart attack, and may not show the same characteristics on a ECG, this condition can be just as fatal. I wanted to warn everyone that if you do experience anything remotely resembling heart problems, see a doc. Love to all!

Married 42yrs Me BW 68Yrs Him F?WH 70yrs OWzero 1988 EA?/PA? Gaslighted. Dday May 28 2010. OW1 1994(6mths PA, EA 16+ years). OW2 2002(8yrs PA). OW3 2009(1Yr PA). Others?? Status: Not Divorcing..but.."You can't unfuck 'em"

posts: 2792   ·   registered: Jul. 8th, 2010   ·   location: Australia
id 8895661
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Gemmy ( member #86765) posted at 1:21 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026

Thank you for posting this. I genuinely needed to read it today.

I have been experiencing massive chest pains since DDay, and I noticed they become significantly worse whenever I am triggered. I always assumed it was simply my body reacting to stress and anxiety, but the way you described this honestly frightened me a little because it feels exactly like what I would imagine a heart attack feels like.

I think many of us underestimate the physical toll this kind of trauma takes on the body. People talk about heartbreak metaphorically, but betrayal trauma truly does feel like your nervous system and your heart are under siege constantly. The hypervigilance, adrenaline, panic, lack of safety, it is relentless.

Your warning is important, especially for those of us who tend to dismiss our symptoms as "just stress." I will be taking this more seriously and getting checked out.

Thank you again for sharing this, and I am so sorry for the pain that brought you to this understanding. Love back to you as well.

Betrayed but trying to stand for the family.
ME: 45 M DDay Oct.18 2025- April 2026 Two LTA first 2 years second 1 year 14 years apart.

posts: 55   ·   registered: Nov. 21st, 2025   ·   location: Ontario Canada
id 8895662
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Unhinged ( member #47977) posted at 2:11 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026

My grandfather died of an aneurysm in his early 70s. This happened rather suddenly, right in front of my grandmother, who held him in his final moments.

A few months later, my grandmother was in the hospital for a relatively minor surgery. She never recovered and died shortly afterwards.

My mother and her siblings were all convinced that she died of a broken heart.

Married 2005
D-Day April, 2015
Divorced May, 2022

"The Universe is not short on wake-up calls. We're just quick to hit the snooze button." -Brene Brown

posts: 7294   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2015   ·   location: Colorado
id 8895666
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Shehawk ( member #68741) posted at 2:13 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026

Thank you for posting this.
Sending healing thoughts to fellow survivors.

"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!

posts: 2082   ·   registered: Nov. 5th, 2018   ·   location: US
id 8895667
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justsendit ( new member #84666) posted at 3:53 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026

I’m sorry that you have had to endure the pain for so long. From a medical perspective, what you are describing is what we call "Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy." It is diagnosed via echocardiogram, but is not often seen on ECG. it’s also called a "stress induced cardiomyopathy." Where cardiomyopathy just means there is pathology in the heart muscle.

What it looks like on echocardiogram is a sort of ballooning of the left ventricle. This is the heart chamber responsible for squeezing oxygenated blood out of the heart and into the systemic circulation - to your brain, and organs, and muscles etc.

The heart works on a curve we call the Frank-Starling curve. It relates the degree of stretch of muscle to the ejection fraction of blood. There is a sweet zone, where just the right amount of stretch produces the best ejection, anything less than that, or anything more than that leads to less blood ejected from the heart in each beat. This is called heart failure. The severity is on a scale.

Most heart failure is ischemic - that means it’s due to lack of blood flow to the heart muscle, usually caused by coronary artery disease from long-standing hypertension, diabetes, high cholesterol, obesity, smoking etc. Some heart failure is due to viral infections, or autoimmune disease etc.

Takotsubo is a unique cause of heart failure. As you mentioned, stress (physical or emotional) can cause a stress reaction which dilates the apex of the left ventricle. This causes it to dilate past the sweet-zone on the Frank-Starling curve and causes a decreased amount of blood to eject from the heart. So to put it another way, broken heart syndrome / Takotsubo cardiomyopathy is a legitimate form of heart failure.

Often, it is just temporary and we can see the heart recover. But it does require management and follow up with a cardiologist. My ICU is frequented by people suffering from this condition. You are 100% correct that it is very real, potentially dangerous, and mimicks a heart attack.

If you are experiencing significant stress (who here hasn’t), and you have symptoms of a heart attack, please call 911 immediately. If your ECG is normal, please ask them to consider an echocardiogram. Most ED physicians these days are capable of an informal bedside ultrasound we call POCUS (point of care ultrasound), if they notice a dilated left ventricle then can obtain a formal echocardiogram and you will be seen by a cardiologist.

For funsies, Takotsubo means octopus trap in Japanese. Those traps (I’ll see if I can attach one from google), appear dilated like the heart does.

My heart goes out to anybody suffering from this condition. The good news is that it’s treatable, but it can be overlooked if your physician isn’t looking for it. Just another testament to the enormous power our emotions and minds have over our physical health. Infidelity sucks.

[This message edited by justsendit at 3:54 PM, Thursday, May 21st]

posts: 36   ·   registered: Mar. 29th, 2024
id 8895673
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Superesse ( member #60731) posted at 6:36 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026

justsendit, THANK YOU for this more detailed explanation and the image. I may have this condition after all the trauma of infidelity and multiple D-Days, family deaths, etc., although my cardiologist who has actually led research into it did not tell me it looked like Takotsubo to him, even though my initial Echo said "heart failure, severe LVH" Hmmmm....

posts: 2558   ·   registered: Sep. 22nd, 2017   ·   location: Washington D C area
id 8895680
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